Hey everyone. I am in Florida. I am having a crappy time. It all started on Wednesday. Scott, Jeremiah, Alex, My Cousin, My Aunt, and I went out to eat. We went to my moms boyfriends resturaunt and had food. It started off well and then everyone was acting up. Scott went away from me to sit with my cousin because Alex and Jeremiah were being stupid. They were funny but stupid. So... then my aunt drove us all to the movies. We went to see that SuperHero movie and we didn't really see the movie. We walked out and just walked around. My cousin and scott stayed in the movies. So we walked around and that was fun but then Alex started smoking... I never new that he did and I got really pissed off. I hate smoking. I do not hate people that do smoke it is just ...him.

Yesterday was the wrost day. Jeremiah, Alex, My cousin, and Jessica went to see another movie. First we went to the guitar center to hang out. Oh yeah... Jeremiah has a problem with stealing. My mom came up to him and wanted to talk to him. She said Jeremiah please do not steal anything around (me) because it will ruin my life. It could if I was with him and he were to be caught. I wouldn't be going back to MD. So after she left and we all went inside. Jeremiah and Alex were like "Were going to Staic (a store like Hot Topic) and we will be back" I knew what they were up to. It pissed me off. I said okay. So I waited outside for an hour. They didn't show up. I walked around to the movies (WHERE WE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN AN HOUR), food places, everything. We couldn't fid them.

This situation really hurt my feelings. It was supposed to be my last time to see MY FRIENDS before I went home and they basically ditched me. I did not want to see a movie with out them. I would feel really bad even if they ditched me. So Jesicca (who at this point I felt really bad because I have not seen her in a long time and I wanted to hang out. The whole night we were looking for my stupid friends.)  my cousin and I went to see a movie. We went to the the Grudge. (We didn't want to see it becuase the Japp. version is 40 times better.) So we didn't see the whole thing. I told her I needed to find the guys. We looked everywhere a number of times. I eventually left and went to Borders while my cousin and jessica were in the movie theater. I just sat there. I wanted to cry. I really wanted to see my friends. I am leaving tomorrow and I don't want to leave this way.

Last night I wanted to go home. I wanted to die. That is the way I felt. This situation might not seem a reason to do that but you were not there.

So... Jessica and my cousin came to look for me and just sat down at the table. They knew that I was hurt. Finally at 9:30 Jeremiah and Alex showed up. They were like we were looking for you everywhere. They looking f***ing high. I think that they went to do drugs and steal shit. I asked Jeremiah if he was smoking and he said no. Later on in the night he said they were smoking pot all night. So we went into Borders and we sat down by the music section. He started to steal a cd. I told him not to and I took it away from him and started to walk toward the front of the store. I bought it for him. It was only like 9$. Then he tryed to get another one. I started to yell at him and I took it away and walked toward the front of the store. He was like no dont buy it. BLA BLA BLA F***ING BLA.

I bought it for him. We went back into the music section and I just stared at him. I never cry..... I started to. He looked at me and looked like he was going to cry. I didn't know if this was real. I felt like I was in a dream the worst freaking dream of all time. I hated it. I didn't hate them.... Something my cousin and Jessica do not understand. They are my friends... I don't know why they are changing. Or have they always done this and I never realised it?

So he looked like he was going to cry. Alex got pissed off at me because I wanted to go to Jessica's house instead of his. He had been at my house for three days. The only reason Jeremiah was going to Alex's was becuase he thought that I was going. I didnt even end up going to Jessica's. Where we dropped her off I cryed and hugged her for the longest time. I told her that I was really sorry. I hate this. I should of forgot about the guys and spent time with her. So alex got pissed and I got really upset and Jeremiah took me outside and we sat on the side. I just hugged him. Alex eventually came out and was nice again. I cryed and hugged both of them. I never cry and since they saw me they promissed to stop doing drugs and stealing. I do not know if I can trust them. I guess I will have to wait.

Then I left. I think they FINALLY REALIZED how serious I was. I dont care I just want to go home. I need a real friend right now. The only one's that I have are stupid. Jessica isn't and I feel really bad about not really hanging out. Scott is not stupid but he is away right now. Things have happened between us that have ruined a chunk of our friendship. I can not wait to go to Marryland. Florida is one place that makes me sad. I do not want to come back. I am going to work extremley hard in school so I don't have to. Even tho there are people I miss... I can't controll my feelings....

Thanks for reading.